A Flower of Snow
by Tasogare-Taichou
Summary: A short vignette that explores why Hiashi is so hard on his daughter. Pairings: None, but implied NejiHina


A Flower of Snow

A short Hyuuga vignette on the REAL reason why Hyuuga Hiashi is so hard on his eldest daughter.

Rating: T

Pairings: None, though implied NejiHina

Genre: Drama, General

He calls her weak, because that is what she is. A failure, an embarrassment to a clan that prides itself on strength and prestige. A blot on the illustrious Hyuuga name. He pushes her, and berates her, and belittles her. He makes her doubt herself, doubt her strength, and doubt even her own existence. He watches with impassionate eyes as she struggles against his withering gaze. Others would remark at the cruelty he shows to his eldest daughter, but Hyuuga Hiashi sees it differently. He sees all that they see, though he never tells her. He sees her struggles, her improvements, her heartaches and her sorrow. He sees the way that her shoulders sag under his criticism, and the way that her eyes grow dim as he turns from her yet again. He sees the way that she watches her younger sister, envy and jealousy warring with the pride and encouragement in her eyes. He sees her hurt as her only sibling snubs her, dismissing her with the same disdain that the rest of her family does. He watches as she simply nods, shouldering her pain and trudging through life. He sees all of this and more.

He sees the way that she once looked at Uzumaki Naruto. The way her pale eyes lit up and her face reddened whenever the blond boy looked her way. He sees the way she stammered, pushing slender fingertips together in a gesture indicative of her trembling heart. He saw the way that she cringed from his harsh scolding when he let his anger gain yet another foothold over him. Saw the way that something fragile inside of her drooped under the weight of his disapproval. He saw the way her soul shuddered when she accepted rejection. Watched as she simply smiled through her tears and congratulated Naruto on finally dragging the one he truly loved back from Otogakure. He saw as she hid herself where no one would find her, knew as she finally gave in to the heartbreak and sobbed in a manner unfit for any shinobi.

He watched as her tears eventually dried and her broken spirit healed. He sees the way that she now looks at Neji, and the way her breath catches in her throat when she unexpectedly runs into her cousin. He watches the way she bites her lip as she is once again ignored by the one she cherishes. He sees how she has grown, matured, aged. Become a lovely young woman and a competent medic-nin. He watches her as she runs to join her teammates, as she laughs at their jokes and revels in their companionship. He sees the tender way that she nurtures the genin team she has been entrusted with, treating her students as though they were her own children. He sees the way she still watches Neji, though her glances towards him are no longer wrought with nervousness because she knows that even though Neji doesn't show it, he cares.

Hyuuga Hiashi's eyes see all of this, but they also see more. They see dark indigo hair that reflects the light, reminding him of another who was weak. They see a gentle smile and a kind and giving spirit that once resided in a pair of white eyes that gazed up at him. They see a soft voice and a giving nature that mirror those of a past long-since placed on a dusty shelf in reverence. They see the hidden strength that so few ever get to witness, the depth of her spirit and the lengths of her care.

What Hiashi's eyes see, Hinata's eyes never will. They will never know the twinge that he sees whenever he watches her smiling at Neji. Never see the tears that gather at the corners of his eyes when he sees her sitting in the sunlight and enjoying the breeze. Never know the heartache that speaks to him whenever he sees her struggle to overcome her challenges. Hinata will never know, because Hiashi will never share it. He will never tell her of the mother who died in childbirth all those years ago. Of the wife he cherished more then life itself. Of the shy, withdrawn girl who loved snow that he once scorned as weak. The dark-haired angel who lit his world from within before he even acknowledged her worth. She will never know of the way that he watched with wide-eyed astonishment as Hyuuga Hanako pushed her broken body from the floor and stood to stare him in the eyes, white meeting white as she declared her resolve to stand up for her nindo. She will never understand how that one defining moment changed Hyuuga Hiashi's perspectives forever. Nor will she ever know how the way she looks at Neji reminds him so much of the way that Hanako once gazed at him. Or that he knows things will work out for his daughter because he sees himself in his nephew and realizes that one day Neji will see the gift that she holds for him.

Hinata will never know of the way that he smiled tenderly down at her tiny form when she was born. Of the way that Hanako smiled gently and apologized for not giving him the son that he'd wanted. Of how he had shaken his head and told her that an even greater gift was a little girl in the image of his beloved. She will never understand his fear when the medic shook her head and ushered him into a darkened room. Never see the way he clung to the pale and fragile white hand and begged the light of his life not to leave him. Never know the way she smiled sadly and said that her only regret had been that she wouldn't see the snow with him again. His daughter will never know of the anguish that rent his heart and shook his frame as he sobbed into the bloodied sheets. She will never know that for a time it was only she that he could look at, unable to see the face of the child who had stolen her mother's life with her mere birth.

All Hinata knows is that her father's cruelty and coldness is reserved only for her. But she doesn't know that it is all in vain. That no matter how much he pushes her away, no matter how harsh and strict he is to her, that none of it can make him blind to what his eyes see. She will never know that every moment he watches her, he sees her mother in her. Never see that his gaze is clouded with pain and grief, her mere form a reminder of his loss. She will never understand that his coldness is the only way he knows to distract himself.

And so he watches her, as she tenderly kneels to brush the snow from a single flower of spring. So weak and vulnerable, yet so strong and pure. And in that instant, crouched under the veil of white, Neji looming protectively behind her, Hyuuga Hiashi can put aside his pain and his anger and resentment at his own loss. For even though she is weak, she is also strong. And in that knowledge, he can be at peace.

OK, so despite the fact that I normally portray Hiashi as something of a really mean bastard, I had this idea come to me when I realized that we never actually SEE Hinata and Hanabi's mother. Logical assumption would be that she is either deceased, or she simply never leaves the Hyuuga compound. Now, though either of these works, I tend to think that she's deceased, as we never even have mention of her. As Hanabi is obviously very much like her father, and she and Hinata are fairly night and day, I think it's safe to assume that Hinata takes more after her mother. That being said, I don't think it's that strange to assume that she reminds Hiashi of her mother, OR that the relationship she and Neji have is remniscent of the one that perhaps once existed between Hiashi and his wife. Hence this little drabble of Hiashi's musings over why he treats his daughter the way he does. I hope everyone enjoyed, and please review and tell me what you think.


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